My Discourse Against The World
Monday, August 08, 2005
You Stab Me In The Back and I'll Stab Yours
So, you work at company A. You work on accounts of company A, brought in by account directors of company A. You want help bring in business, so you go to company B, and bring in some business from them.
That would make company B YOUR client, right?
So then, company A makes you sign a non compete agreement with them, so you can't steal any of their clients, and before the ink is dry, they fire you.
So, even if you start working at another company, say company C, you can't go to those old clients and bring in business, because you signed an agreement not to, and also because it would be slightly dishonorable.
So then, you hear that company A, the one that fired you, is now going after the business of company B, YOUR CLIENT. Is that Kosher? Can company A make you sign a non compete and then steal your clients out from under you?
What exactly would you call that? I'd call it selfish and dishonorable. Furthermore, I would consider that as canceling out any obligation one might have to company A.
I just can't believe that they would do that...the gall! Going after my client after treating me the way they did. Now I'm going to do my best to steal as much business from them as possible, and if they want to threaten legal action, go right the fuck ahead. You people are dispicable, and I am more than glad I am not there anymore. Furthermore, I really hope that your company fails. I fail to see anything worth saving over there, other than the jobs of a few good people who have been sucked under by the undertow of your evil souls.
Monday, August 01, 2005
A Vacation From Vacation
Well, its been an interesting year so far to say the extreme very least. Most recently, I was laid off from the last company I was at, and so I've been unemployed for the past two months.
Which put me in a funk, a deep miserable lay on my ass and do nothing funk. Sure, I applied to jobs, and networked, but what does that leave me? Sitting in my apartment all day, on the computer, in the SUMMER, when I am basically on vacation! In any case, its not like I knew where to go travel, or who to go with. I mean, I wanted to get out and use this time to my advantage, but I was in such a funk that I couldn't plan for shit.
However, in the past 72 hours things have, amazingly, begun to look up (though the reality may in fact be different, as in, pointing down.)
About 2 weeks ago I started to feel like I was getting sick, or a cold, or something. Being sick while unemployed REALLY sucks. And I wasn't getting better. I had a sore throat that wouldn't go away, and I could almost feel the bronchitis germs breeding in the fertile grounds of my lungs.
And then I got a chance to house sit in jersey for a week, last week, and I took it. I chilled out with buds, enjoyed being in the suburbs, and not being stuck in my apartment. However, I didn't get better.
Finally i went to the doctor, who told me it wasn't strep, and said I should take an anti-biotic just in case. So I started taking it, and the next day...I felt a little better. I don't know if it was because after 8-9 days my immune system finally attacked the virus, or if it was the anti biotics, or what, but I feel much better now, with no sore throat.
In addition, I had two parties this weekend. On Friday I went to southern jersey to a welcome home party for Kevin, who is back from Iraq on military leave for 3 weeks. This party was actually scheduled about 2 weeks ago, but due to Hurricane Andrew, and Kevin's consequent evacuation from his military base, we had to post pone it. But anyway, I went down there, and saw a bunch of friends I haven't seen in a long time. that felt really good, to be hang out with old friends, and just remember the old days, and to see how we're all fitting in to the new days. I played pool, chilled, had Marble Krispies (TM A&E V.), awesome dip, a couple of Mike's, and chilled with the M.
After we left the party I took the wrong direction on the GSP, but eventually got turned around and got back home.
The next day was Chris and Jess's Engagement party out in Western NJ. I put M on a train, after my parents got back from their cruise, and then headed out to the party (after waiting for J for about two hours so he could buy a bathing suit he wouldn't even use.)
Went out there, chilled out, had some food, saw some people, congratulated the people's with the balls and chains newly attached to their bodies, and then...
Into the pool! I still wasn't feeling so hot, so I wasn't sure about getting in the pool, but after dangling my legs in it for 20 minutes, I couldn't resist. Turns out to have been a great idea. I played pool ping pong with the bro, broke out the frisbee, and made some dives. Other people finally joined us in the pool, and after 2 hours I felt like I had definitely got my swimming on.
After I got out of the pool we left pretty soon afterward, and got really lost on the way back, because a street was named something else than the directions said. But we eventually got that sorted out, and headed home.
Got some cheese fries and chicken fingers for a late night snack with the bro, after some night frisbee, then crashed.
The next day I was woken up by my brother who thought I was calling his name, and who convinced me to go out to breakfast to the diner with the best homefries in NJ, the Ritz. It kind of screwed up my whole schedule, but I went anyway. Our breakfast order got messed up, and we ended up waiting almost half an hour for it (while listening to a toddler next to us make sure his lungs could still shriek), but the food was good, so eventually it was ok.
After that we rushed home, showered, and I hopped on a train to the city. What's the rush? Pool league at 4! and I wanted to win a match! I felt so good, that I was ready to bet money on myself to win.
Got back to my apartment, took care of some things, then headed back out to manhattan to the bar at 40th and lex. I got off at 59th, and decided to walk 20 blocks downtown, thats how good I felt. On the way there I realized that Roey was only a few blocks away, and called him to invite him to chill at the bar while we played league.
He was game, and said he'd meet us there later. Got to the bar, had a drink or two, watched some pool. Then my turn to play came up, and I was playing against another guy around my age. (race to 2 games.)
I didn't shoot that well the first game, and he won it. The 2nd game I bounced back, controlled the table, and ended up with an easy 8 ball shot. The third game was touch and go, and at the end I had 1 ball left and the 8, with ball in hand.
So I decide to push the ball all the way across the table into the corner, to give myself a leave on the 8 in the side. Apparently I could have made a much easier shot, to give myself a better leave. Hal was jumping up and down, literally gnawing on the edge of his hat, because he thought I made the wrong decision.
Well. I made my ball in, and left myself with a tough angle shot on the 8 into the side. I looked at it, lined it up, held my breath, readjusted my angle, and hit it nice and soft. And sunk it! I won! I won!
That felt fucking awesome. Especially since my whole team was like, "why the fuck did you shoot that last ball all the way across the table!? You could have made it in the corner, which it was 4 inches from! I couldn't explain to them that the way I had chosen was how I saw it in my head, and I just knew it would work. Anyway, its moo, since I won :-).
After watching another match or two, roey and i left for his apartment to chill, only a few blocks away. While we were there, he played for me a rap album which he and some friends had produced a demo of. It was, um, pretty, um, interesting. I actually thought it wasn't that bad, but to be honest, 3 white guys trying to rap in their apartment just ain't going to cut it. But it was still pretty funny.
Then we checked out what Cho Chang will look like in the upcoming harry potter movie. Not bad.
After a checking that out, we reminisced about high school, breaking out the new directory and our year book. Turns out several people had died that I graduated with, and I hadn't known about it. Kathy Ewig, who I had known since middle school, has passed away. I don't know any details, but it makes me very sad. I'm going to try and find out what happened.
After we looked at the yearbooks, Hal showed up. We chilled, we showed him our yearbook pictures, and after a little while both Hal and I left to go to our separate apartments. I went back to my place, watched some tv, had a bite, and tried to sleep.
What I didn't mention was that on Friday a company I have a relationship with offered me a senior position! I told them I needed to think about it, and today I accepted it. Not sure if its what I want to do, but its a move in the right direction I think. Better than feeling sorry for myself while sitting on my ass.
So, in the past 72 hours I've gotten a job, hung with old friends, gotten out of my funk, gotten better from being sick, won a pool league match yesterday, learned some disturbing news, and then accepted the new position. So, its been a crazy couple of days, and an even more crazy 2005. I hope the 2nd half of this year is full of good trends, like the past 72 hours, and that the past few days weren't jus the eye of the storm. Tune back next week, ladies, gentleman, and kiddies, and find out what is next in store for...Sam!
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
Some People Need To Be Dead and Buried
You wonder if you're a person capable of cold blooded violence. Never having been faced with that position, or never taking advantage when that situation presents itself, I'm really not sure. I've never kicked someone when they're down, or tried to seriously hurt a person.
But read this article, about what happened to this innocent little girl, and you will find your blood boiling.
I sincerely hope she can move on in her life and put this behind her. I hope she can come to terms with it, or even forget it, so it won't follow her where ever she goes.
But another feeling I have is rage. I hope that he finds pain and misery for the rest of his life. If it were up to me to deliver punishment, he would find that I am a violent person after all.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Let There Be Cool Stuff
Holy Shit. Thomas Edison was a fucking genius! Or, I could even say, Thomas Edison is, in a weird way, if you'll allow me to explain, a fucking genius.
After watching a special on the History channel about the aforementioned Thomas Edison, I remembered how important Thomas Edison is. He invented (among many other things), A) The practicle lightbulb as a usable and cheap light source, B) The first phonograph which first allowed people to listen to recorded music*, and C) The first motion picture, i.e., first motion pictures that the public could see (see kinetoscope: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinetoscope) That one really caught my eye.
Because what I learned was that Edison created the first portable motion picture viewing station available to the public. Do you remember seeing those small, literally old school, viewing stations for kids at like a mall or something? You'd sort of bend over and look into something and put in a dime or a nickel, pull the crank, and images, like the running of a horse or two boxers fighting a match, would run across the inside of the contraption. I remember the one in the kids shoe store I went to at the mall. I loved that thing.
What I was thinking is that invention started not a trend, but a revolution. With people, and many children, being captivated by moving images for the first time, it quickly became a highly desired medium. That was the predecessor of our modern tv's, movies, video games, you name it. And that is a product that Edison helped to directly create and market. Basically, I think that by inoculating the youth of America, and the world, with those machines that cost a nickel to watch moving images, he planted the seeds of what wI would like to call Moving Image Addiction, or MIA. People are insatiable in their desire for moving images to entertain them.
So among other inventions including the first motorized fan and the first electric battery specifically created to serve in an engine, we live surrounded by his genius. The lights in our house. The images on tv. the fan blowing in the humid air. When you come right down to it, the ideas that made the ipod eventually possible.
So, Thomas Edison is no longer with us, but his genius, his inventions, his desire to create a better world, are with us every day. His brilliance lives on. So, Mr. Edison is still a fucking genius.
And one other thing makes this particularly poignant for me. I was in an A&P supermarket in, say, north central, NJ, when I somehow started a conversation with an old woman, or she started one with me.
She was very nice, and told me that she knew Thomas Edison. Apparently she was a secretary and worked in his building when she was young, and said he was a very nice man. She said her building was in West Orange, NJ. Not too far away. And she was very old.
I did not, however, believe her. The first thing I did when I got home was check out Thomas Edison. He did, eventually, have a facility in West Orange, which I was reminded of by the History channel special. So yes, it is entirely possible that she knew him, and worked for him, in the early 20th century. This woman, old, wizened, and stuck in Jersey :-), remembered Thomas Edison as a person, as the great man that he is.
That just struck me then, as it does now, as kind of wonderful. Edison is just a man, but he's a man who saw things that maybe would not have been seen, probably not in exactly the same way, which have helped to shape life as we can understand it. I mean, we don't have to understand how our tv works, or how our building is lighted, but he did, and that was enough. So she carried a piece of Edison with her, he was alive to her through her memory, and I felt like that was transferred to me, a bit, by talking with her.
By telling me this story, I became a part of history. I spoke with someone who knew Thomas Edison. I didn't even think it was possible, I thought he was dead way too long for that. But he died in 1931, and this occurred in, say, 1995. If she was 20 when working there, by 1998 she'd be in her 80's probably. Edison himself lived until he was 84.
So, I believe that Edison is a great man by his inventions surrounding us, and my connection to him through a nice old woman in NJ. Thanks Tom, this light's for you.
*Actually, the only invention that can be soley contributed to Thomas Edison is the phonograph
Monday, June 27, 2005
GONE FOR A WHILE, BUT DEFINITELY TO RETURN TRIUMPHANTLY
I found my Social Security Card! I lost it ages, AGES, ago, no idea where it went to. I kept meaning to get another one, I even filled out the paperwork and only had to go to the soc sec office, but I was really trepidatious about doing that. I was going to wait until I needed one, and then do it.
So I go through my desk, and under a couple of old ID cards, there it was!! I can't believe how big an idiot I am. I must have changed wallets a while ago, taken out old/defunct id's, and it stuck to the back of one of them.
So now I have proof that I'm a legal citizen again. Hazzah!
CRUISIN THROUGH BUG TERRITORY
The day after my central park trip, I decided thats what I wanted to do this summer. Find places that I've never seen before, in the area, and hike them.
So the next day I went to get a suit with my dad, 'cause he also wanted to stop by a used booksale at Drew U. I wanted to do the suit and booksale thing and still have time to find a place to hike, but I ended up getting up really late, so I cut it pretty tight.
Got a sweet suit at Lord and Taylor, which was also having a sale, then off to D.U. When we got there we had no idea where the booksale was, but we saw a sign for parking. So we parked, and walked uphill for a while, searching for any signs and asking people. Eventually we got directions to a flad building at the end of the campus, and we walked all the way there. I felt bad for my dad, 'cause it was really hot and uphill and he looked tired.
We went in, and i perused books for a little while. i skimmed a children's story about Channukah, about a guy who keeps getting visited by demons who try to keep him from lighting the candles. At the end he convinces the head demon to light the candles himself, thereby ending his power and ensuring the symbolic miracle of channukah. Kinda cute.
Then I went back to the car to drive it over to the booksale so dad wouldn't have to walk back to it. I sat and waited for a while, then went in to go look for him. No sign of him. So I went back to the car, and luckily I looked down the road and there was dad, 100 feet away, walking back to the car. I yelled to him, then got the car and picked him up.
After that we drove back to the house, where I met up with T, J, and JG. We couldn't decide on where to go to eat, no surprise there, and so I went to the Blue Moon Diner with J, JG went to Wendy's, and T went to the healthfood store for a smoothee.
Bluemoon Diner was crap. my cheese steak was ok, except for the fact tht half of the bread was disgustingly soggy with God knows what. J's burger was so bad he didn't even eat half of it.
Then we met back at my house, and all hopped in JG's car. We decided to go to CheeseQuake state park, off the GSP. It was close and I hadn't been there before.
So we drove down, made good time. Got there, stopped, got some maps, and continued on. All we wanted to do was fine some place by ourselves where we could chill and throw the frisbee around. We found a place that had a scenic view marker on the map, and parked there. After throwing the frisbee around in the parking lot/grass, we started up the trail.
Just then I heard a double honk behind me. I turn around, and there's the park ranger in his cop car. T and I are closest so we walk towards him, asking whats up.
He says, "Just wanted you to know this is a cruisin spot." We're like, um, what? So then he says, "This is a spot where GUYS go to CRUISE." and suddenly I'm like, ohhhhh, and I musta looked really dumb, because I made such an "ohhhh" face, 'cause I couldn't believe he just said that.
so T says, "Ok, then I WON'T keep my eyes peeled.", and the cop laughs. He tells us there's been a problem with guys driving around and meeting other guys for illicit trysts, but he's been cutting down on it. Then he asked us where we're going.
We motion towards the trail and say something about a scenic view. He says there's not much of a view, and we could see it from almost where we were standing, or over there. He was basically telling us not to go down the trail. Well, we wanted our place to 'chill', so we were like thanks, and continued down the trail anyway.
About halfway down the trail we noticed there were way too many bugs. but we continued anyway. near the end of the trail, where it would have been a perfect place to stop, the bugs started literally SWARMING. I saw 8 bugs on T's back, I swatted them away with the frisbee. Then I looked at JG, and saw 8 bugs on HIS back. Thats when I realized that if there were 8 bugs on T's back, and 8 on JG's back, there must be 8 on MINE as well, and thats when I freaked. I shouted, lets get out of here, and instantly everyone agreed and started running back down the trail. We were swapping bugs away wildly with our hands, and finally got back to the parking lot.
The cop came back, saw as slapping each other to get the bugs off, and laughed, saying, "The bugs got you, eh?" We said yes, and how they were swarming. He laughed again and drove off. Just then a car swung around in the parking lot. The cop came right back and said to us, see that, thats one of THEM, i.e. the cruisers. We were like, ohhh, and watched him go and pull them over.
We got back into our car to look for a less buggy spot, and found a huge meadow off one of the roads. We threw the frisbee around, chilled, then got back in our car and left.
When we got back I played a little b-ball one on one with J, who won 5-3, and then some horse, which I bowed out of 'cause I was tired. After everyone left, I asked JG where we could go eat. I was starving, and didn't know what I wanted, so it must have been a stroke of genuius/inspiration when he said, "JP Lees?" A mongolian all you can eat barbecue...perfect!
So we went there, and stuffed our faces. I ate so much. However, Charlie would not leave us alone. I think he was really bored, so he came over to us as we were eating, sat down, and chatted with us. Finally he left us alone after a certain amount of grunting yes's and no's on our part.
(Charlie is like the matrie de/manager of the place. He's known us since we started going there years ago, and remembers our names, 'cause we're twins, and Jo's name, 'cause he's so blonde. But the last time my bro and dad were there, apparently Charlie pumped my dad for stock tips, so much that my dad had to tell him, "I can't tell you this, my clients pay a lot of money for this info." JG hadn't been back there since.
After that I hopped a train back to the city, satisfied with that week's hiking adventures.
A TRIP TO THE PARK
So last week I decided to start a summer of sojourns into nature, the wilderness, and various state and national parks in the area. Ever since going on some tours as a teenager which involved sleeping in tents and hiking mountain after mountain, I've developed a love of the outdoors and good weather.
Last Wednesday I was bored and decided to visit Central Park, specifically parts I hadn't seen yet. Its a big place, and I usually have no reason to go up to 95th and lexington, other than visit the Googenheim, so I hadn't really seen that area of the park.
I had a late start in the day, so I didn't get to manhattan until around 3:30. It had been beautiful, sunny, and hot the whole day...the second I got out of the subway it started to rain. The weather/demon people had been predicting thunderstorms, but why should I belive them?
Anyway, I get above ground and it starts to rain. I think to myself, WWCD? So I decide to say fuck it, go into Duane Rhede, and buy an umbrella. Its still warm outside and nice, just raining, so I buy the umbrealla, open it up, listen to my ipod, and walk to the Park.
I pass the Gugenheim looking for a way into the park. I eventually cross over this street that leads into the park, and I'm somewhere I've never been before. I decide to walk up this incline and see whats up there: its the walking/running track surrounding the lake in the northern part of the park. I never even knew it was there!
So I walk around it, meanwhile its pouring, and almost no one is in the park except a few joggers that pass me every 5-10 minutes. I had the place almost to myself.
So I walked around it, having a great time, enjoying the solitude, the warm weather, the rain. I mean, my shorts got thoroughly soaked, but I totally didn't care. It was just what I wanted. However, halfway through the track I saw this wooden bridge linking to another side of the park, and I decided to see what was over there. It was a wooden bridge, wet and slick with rain, with a gentle slope, so I took it easy on the way up, not wanting to fall. On the way down I must have forgotten why I was being careful, and I slipped forward, my legs went out from under me, and I landed solidy on my ass on the wet dirty bridge. I think one guy who was walking below the bridge saw me. I got up, wiped myself off, and decided that whatever was on this side of the bridge wasn't worth it.
So after walking around the track once, I decided to continue north to see what else there was to see. While cutting across some grass an ambulance actually stopped and asked for directions to 95th st. I waved vaguely towards where I thought they could get there, and continued on my way. I hope they found the person they were looking for to help.
After that I entered the woods/forest, which was cool. I was looking specifically for the North Field just 'cause I don't think I'd seen it. I walked through the forest, and came out on the north western side of the park. I continued south, and got to the Great Hill. Um, don't see whats so great about it.
About nowish I started making my own paths. I mean, I know there are hiking trails in the park, but I didn't have a map, and I didn't see any markers, so wherever I saw something that looked like a dirt path I followed it. That was fun, but soon I was going up hills and I was getting tired and sweaty. I finished my drink, and eventually followed signs towards the North Fields. I walked through those, which contained some baseball fields, and saw another meadow, which people playing soccer and kids picknicking. I enjoyed that sight for a while, and walked through it and onto the street, ending my journey.
I sat down for a little while, and while doing that I saw a guy riding a unicycle. I wish I had a camera for that. Then I walked to lex to catch the 6, and transferred for the N at leg/59th. I decided to go into Jerz and hang with people and check out a state park the next day, I was also going to go to Macy's to buy a suit and spend some time with my dad.
When I got on the N train, I sat down, and then lo and behold, B.M. walks in the car, taps my shoulder, and sits next to me. That was weird. So we chatted for a little while, then I got off at my stop, and thats the end to this story.
*B.M., as opposed to popular opinion, does not mean bowel movement. It refers to a past coworker of mine who I have remained friends with after we both left that previous company. She lives in my area, so I do see her on the subway sometimes heading back towards home.
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
GET YOUR PREDATOR OFF MY ALIEN
So last night I finally watched "Alien Vs. Predator", which I'd been wanting to see ever since I heard about it. I mean, what a great idea! Both movies have classic sci-fi/horror figures, and I thought it would be great entertainment to watch them battle.
However, everyone I know who saw A vs P said it was horrible. It sucked. Not worth your time. Which was very dissapointing. I mean, take "Starship Troopers", the movie adapted from Robert Heinlein's book. Excellent. Campy, fun, dangerous, and even some funny jokes here and there. I loved it.
So of course I wanted to see the sequel. I heard it was bad. I saw it anyway.
It was BAD. I mean, Starship Troopers 1 was made well with good cinematogrophy, good lighting, funny if not great acting, and we all loved how it was made to seem like a documentary.
#2 was none of those things. the whole movie was dark so you could barely see what was going on, the acting was among the worst I've ever seen for a big studio movie, the plot was non existent, and it simply was not enjoyable to watch. In short, an honest waste of time.
So I was very trepidatious about A Vs P. However, I was bored last night, it was the only movie On Demand that I wanted to see, so I bit the bullet and bought it for 24 hours.
I thought it wasn't bad, personally. It was made like a serious movie, and it looked good. There was one or two fight scenes between aliens and predators that were totally awesome, and I really liked how the chick became partners with the lead Predator. and everyone else died. It was QUITE unbelievable, I will admit that. The funniest thing I thought was how a couple of the characters, after seeing these aliens in action for no more than a few minutes, suddenly came to the exact same concusion that Ripley did in all the Alien movies: These aliens must not be allowed to reach the earth, because then everything will die.
How the hell did they reach that conclusion? They didn't know anything about these aliens, for all they knew they were actually robots! Anyway, that was a little implausible. But despite that, the pyramid/trap that kept on changing and screwing everyone was cool. Plus the idea that predators had to earn their manhood by killing these aliens, and they first had to find their guns in the pyramid. That was cool.
And I KNEW that an alien had gotten onto the face of the last predator. But they didn't say anything about it. Until the end. When he's dead and lieing there with the earth slowly fading out from the viewport. And then the alien burst from his chest, looking like a mixture of alien and predator. that sent chills down my spine.
So, over all, I'd give that movie a B-. I enjoyed watching it, good action scenes, and well done. I am slightly biased because I wanted to see the movie in the first place, and my expectations were so low that I, well, wasn't expecting much, so it was a pleasant surprise when it WASN'T as bad as Starship troopers 2. I am glad I didn't see it in the theatre though, that definitely would have been a dissapointment.
"Don't you turn your back on me!"
Thursday, June 16, 2005
A BACHELOR PARTY TO REMEMBER
Marriage is a wonderful time in a person's life. Its when everything all starts to come together, and you begin to build a life with the person you love.
It's also your one last opportunity to get fucked up and sleep with strippers. I am, of course, referring to the age old custom of "The Bachelor Party". Hoo yea!
This story begins with my 3rd Cousin, Stu Young, who might as well be my first cousin. He's straight up, honest, hard working, genuine, loyal, and a cool guy. Unfortunately, he made the mistake of proposing to a Jewish female, so now he'll be whipped for the rest of his natural born life.
However, this brings us to the meat of the story, which is the party itself.
It was to be a whole weekend affair. Friday night I met up with Stu and his friends at the Heartland Brewery for dinner. I was a little trepidatious, because I had never met his friends before, and I didn't know what to expect. Would they be hardasses? Lame? Cool? Alls I knew was that I'd be spending the majority of the weekend with them.
I showed up to the HB in times square at around 8, the arranged meeting time. Let me make a personal note at this point: I absolutely detest the Heartland Brewery. They're overpriced, have a bad food selection, the waitstaff is almost always rude and arrogant, their beer sucks, and I don't like the atmosphere. Oh, and they put the tables so close together you might as well be at a buffet dinner with strangers.
We show up, wait a bit for someone else, decide they'll be way too late, and get seated. I introduce myself to Stu's friends, such as Josh, Alex, and apparently Stu's sister's new fiance...who I hadn't heard about! When was I going to hear that she got engaged to some random dude?!
Anyway, I showed up, introduced myself, and tried to get comfortable with the situation. It actually wasn't too bad, they were all nice guys, and I was in a relatively chatty mood, so it worked out. We ended up telling some jokes, most of which were bad. The worst definitely goes to Stu's friend Jeff, who told the story about Abraham, Ruth, and the infamous 'suck.' Lets just say, it sucked.
Lol. Anyway, dinner wasn't terrible. The waiter was very nice, and he offered to make us a sampler platter of appetizers, though there wasn't one on the menu. That turned out to be a bad idea, and you'll find out why in a second.
Anyway, I ordered a buffalo cheese burger, though I'm not sure if I ended up getting that or a regular burger, 'cause the person next to me ordered the same thing, except ground beef instead of buffalo.
So we eat our meal, some people get desert, and I had a bite of the apple pie, which was pretty good.
Then we get the bill. Guess what they charged us for the sampler platter. 60$ PLUS. Apparently they took 3-4 appetizers and put them together on a plate, which is what a sampler platter is, right? Wrong. They simply gave us 4 appetizers and charges us full price for each one, which is NOT what a sp is!! Right?
So we blew up. We asked the waiter what was up, and he just played dumb. Then we complained to the manager, young lady who probably was younger than me. She was like, "we don't have a sampler platter on the menu." we're like, yea, duh, then how did we get one? She tried to play it off as the waiter's mistake, like, oh, he shouldn't have done that, its his fault/problem, not mine. Nothing I can do, you ate the food.
So we argued back and forth, and she wasn't giving an inch. finally she's like, if its that big of a deal for you, I'll take it off your bill and make the waiter pay for it.
Now, we're not assholes, and we're not sure if the waiter did this on purpose, or what, but thats ridiculous. More than $60 out of his paycheck? for a waiter thats like a week's pay.
So we're like, fine, can we speak with your boss? "No", she says, "he just left." what bullshit. So finally we're like, this is a bachelor party, and you are taking advantage of us. We're not going to stick it to the waiter. Just know that we're never coming back here again. And I won't.
So I ended up paying more than $60 for a hamburger deluxe and a coke...we all split Stu's part of the check, its his day after all. But somehow I ended up having to pay a ton of money.
So, thats why I'm never going back there to the Heartless Brewery ever again. They can blow me. And after this, I'm writing a letter to them about that manager, and exactly what she said to us. The rest of the bachelor party weekend will be in the next blog.
BACHELOR PARTY WEEKEND PART DEUX
After that horrid dinner was over, and we had finished slamming the managers head into the sampler platter repeatedly, we left the shithole they like to call a restaurant.
The next part of the evening was going to a bar, but I was dead exhausted, and wanted to be awake for the next night in Atlantic City. So I chatted with the boys for a while and let them know I'll see them again tomorrow. Stu's friend Josh told me to subway it to BK and he'd pick me up and him, Stu, and myself would drive down to AC.
Oh, and I had bought a book that day about casino games, and I lent to Stu's friend Dave, who seemed pretty cool/nice. Though, I was pretty mad about it afterwards, 'cause I really wanted to read it for the trip down there. But apparently I remembered enough of what I had read anyway...
So I left the boys, went back to queens, chilled, and crashed.
The next day I wanted to leave my house at like 11:30, to make sure I got to BK by 1 pm. I didn't end up getting up until 12'ish though, and got on the train after noon. however that worked out great, because I got there just as they were getting ready to leave. We stopped at Stu's new apt., still under renovation, and then hopped into Josh's SUV.
On the way down we listened to Sirius satellite radio, which is good, except for a loud beeping noise it makes every time you change the channel or move volume up and down. We listened to the mets game and Josh taught me how to play craps so that I almost understood it.
We ended up stopping at a rest stop for a little while, and when we got back on the road we found out the other car that was driving down with us was only half a mile back or less. So we kept trying to find them, but never did.
Eventually we got to the hotel, and went inside the hotel/casino. The wall behind the front desk was a huge aquarium with big fish, and i'm not sure if it was the lighting or the fish or both, but they glowed blue. Pretty cool.
So Josh arranged for two rooms, with two beds each, with a couch as well. We wanted to add a cot to each one, so there was sleeping room for everyone, but the deskperson said that would be a fire hazard, since the rooms weren't big enough.
That wouldn't have been a huge problem...had there been an actual couch in each room. However, when we got upstairs we found two beds in the room, along with two chairs, but no couch. We called down to the front desk, and they let us know there are NO rooms with two beds AND a couch. Fire hazard. So why did the front desk person tell us there would be one? Fucking idiot.
Anyway, after we got settled we just chilled in the room for a while, waiting for everyone to show up. When mostly everyone had gotten there, we went down to the casino for a little while. Josh taught me how to play craps for real, and I played a little bit. I think I might have even won like $50.
But Dave still wasn't there, the infamous late comer. So we went to dinner at the hotel restaurant, which wasn't bad.
After that we broke up and decided to meet a couple of hours later. I played some craps, and some blackjack. I think I ended up losing some money.
After that, we decided to try out some of the other casinos, because Stu had never been to the boardwalk. Thus started the shuttle bus fiasco.
You could take shuttle buses that cost very little from a hotel to different points in AC. However, you could only fit like 8-10 people on one, and there was no standing room, only seats. Like, it was against the law for you to stand.
So the first shuttle that came by only had a few seats open. I went in the first one with two others (out of like 7-8 guys.) Then we waited for around 30-40 minutes for everyone to show up. We went to the boardwalk first, walked around, went to Caeser's Palace, where I lost some more money.
While walking back from Caeser's, I saw some guy who must have been so drunk or high that he could barely stand. All he could do was this weird dancing jig, to keep from falling over. I watched him for a while, waiting for him to fall, but of course he never did.
After that we made our way to Bally's. And just then Dave showed up, it was around midnight. He wanted to go back to the hotel, park, drop off his stuff, and whatnot, so I and a couple of others went back with him. We parked, went to the room, chilled out, and eventually went out again because everone was waiting for us.
Nothing too exciting at Bally's. After that we went to the Borgata, which was packed. We were to meet at the Oyster Bar, but when we got there it had a line way out the door, and I didn't feel like going in there anyway, so I just waited for everyone else to show up. All the tables at the Borgata were way too expensive, so I decided to go back to Harrah's.
Stu went with me. Dave and someone else went to go get pizza. Back at Harrah's I lost some more money. I had brought around $400 with me. Room and food cost around $100, and by around 2 am I had less than $100 left. Which was fine, I expected to lose all of it.
So around then Stu and I went to have a drink at the bar in the casino called "Xhibitions." I didn't know what to expect, but I thought there'd by girls in there or something, pole dancing and whatnot. However, there weren't any. We simply had a drink and played some video poker. I lost about $25. so now I was down to like $60-$70 bucks.
While at the bar this woman went up to Stu and asked him something that sounded like, "Are you D'Angelo?" He said no, and she moved on to me. She asked me the same thing, and I was like, ummmm, what? So then she said, "Want to have a good time?" I was like, oh shit, its a hooker! I was like, ummmmm. so then she said, "You came here to have a good time, right?" I'm like, ummmmm. So finally I say, "Maybe later", and she walked away. I think that answer kinda pissed her off. But what the hell, I ain't paying for a prostitute, and besides, with what money? I mean, yes, we're hanging out at a casino bar by ourselves at 2:30 am and playing video poker, but we're not that desperate.
So finally Stu says he's going to go back to the room. I wish him a good night, and say I'm not ready to go back yet. Just as Stu leaves Dave shows up from his pizza run.
I liked Dave the instant I met him. He's pretty cool, friendly, and smart, and I could tell we'd get along. So anyway he shows up, and we're just chatting, and I say I want to go play some craps. He said he didn't know how to play, blackjack was his game.
Well I was just getting the hang of craps. We went over to a table where there were like 2-3 guys, and started playing. I actually made a few good bets and just about doubled my money from $70 to $140. A guy rolled double sixes, the horn, twice in a row, and the third time Dave said I should bet it. I agreed. However, I forgot to make the bet, and guess what...the guy rolled two sixes again! I was so pissed. But whatever, I made some money.
So after that Dave was like, lets go play some Blackjack. And thats the third part of this story...